Monday, September 16, 2013

Mayweather Beats Canelo Then Goes Back To His Other Job


In a dominant showing on Saturday night, Floyd Mayweather Jr. unified 154-pound titles and reached the 45-0 mark by beating "Canelo" Alvarez.  Immediately after the fight, Mayweather focused his attention on his other job . . . beating women.  We all know that women should not be beaten . . . except maybe for CJ Ross who scored the fight 114-114.  She is the same judge who stole a victory from Manny Pacquiao recently.  Dear CJ, get your head out of your ass.  If no other judge sees the fight like you see it, maybe its time to reassess your judging criteria.

Story here.

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Sanchez To Have Surgery . . . Jets Fans Say "No Problem"


New York Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez is likely to have season-ending surgery on his injured throwing shoulder.  Commented Jets fans, "Don't rush back . . . In fact, have two surgeries."

http://espn.go.com/new-york/nfl/story/_/id/9663997/mark-sanchez-new-york-jets-likely-headed-surgery-labral-tear-shoulder-end-season-sources

Monday, September 9, 2013

Jaguars Get Destroyed By Chiefs . . . But, At Least They Looked Good


The Jacksonville Jaguars have new uniforms this season.  Apparently, the owners are trying to distract fans from realizing how crappy their team is.  The uniforms did not distract the Chiefs, though- Kansas City decimated the Jaguars in Jacksonville yesterday 28-2.  Don't worry Jags- Lots of teams put a "2" up on the final scoreboard . . . but they play baseball.

Story here.

Friday, September 6, 2013

Peyton Throws For 462 Yards & 7 TDs?! . . . STFU!!


The Broncos trounced the Ravens 49-27 thanks to Peyton Manning's golden arm which threw for 462 yards and 7 touchdowns . . . Yep, 7.  7 is also the number of episodes that will air before Lebron's new sitcom gets cancelled.

Story here.

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Former Bear Urlacher Revealed That Players Would "Take A Dive"


Former All-Pro linebacker and Chicago Bear Brian Urlacher admitted that, when he played, they would slow down other teams by asking players to intentionally fake injuries.  In baseball, this practice is known as an "A-Rod."

http://espn.go.com/chicago/nfl/story/_/id/9634085/brian-urlacher-admits-chicago-bears-faked-some-injuries

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

UGA Receiver Gets Injured . . . While Celebrating?!


UGA Wide Receiver Malcolm Mitchell was injured during the Bulldogs loss to the Clemson Tigers this past weekend.  But it wasn't on a spectacular catch or a key block.  Nope.  Mitchell was injured while celebrating in the end zone after teammate Todd Gurley rushed for a 75-yard touchdown in the first quarter of the game.  Mr. Jones (John Witherspoon's character from "Friday") has a question for Mitchell . . . How the hell you gonna get injured on your play off?!

That one was for you, Dad.

http://espn.go.com/college-football/story/_/id/9625483/malcolm-mitchell-georgia-bulldogs-hurts-acl-celebrating-teammate-td

Sunday, September 1, 2013

Pats Cut Tebow - Belichick Turns Out To Be The Devil


Tim Tebow was cut by the New England Patriots this week.  This confirms what we already expected . . . Bill Belichick is Beelzebub.

If cutting Tebow wasn't enough evidence for you, consider this-

1) Belichick cheated by stealing other teams' signals during Spygate
2) Belichick prefers to play on Sundays thereby distracting people from going to church and
3) Belichick is Miley Cyrus' real father